Post by wordy on Jul 31, 2011 19:56:32 GMT 10
Top Ten Tips for surviving SMACKDOWN
by
Last year it was all about me and this year, I was one of those who battled it out! With my tips for surviving the most fierce of competitions, you'll come away a winner-- and even better, with your love safely in hand.
1. Hydrate. You never know what's around the corner-- your king grabbing you for an afternoon canoodle or a lovely lady feeling lonely, so make sure to drink lots of water and keep your strength up!
2. Watch out for people with blue eyes. Oh, sure, they might look pretty, but treachery is around every corner. Note: this does not apply to every blue-eyed lover out there, just those that run in packs.
3. Work on your sprinting skills. You need to be able to run if you want to be a good knight. The same applies to SMACKDOWNing.
4. Brush up on your outdated slang. I know that we're all hip to the jive, but occasionally people pop up calling you a 'sweet gixie' or a 'sarden looby', and then you really need to know if they're insulting you or not.
5. Be wary of zombies. They have a certain affinity for large, hulky, hunky knights. Back off, he was mine first.
6. Find yourself a good ravine. They're the best thing to
7. Swivel chairs are your friends. So are dramatic reveals. Just make sure you practice first-- one flubbed line and the whole act is toast.
8. You can never over-prepare for sudden death rounds. This ties back to #1-- hydrate!
9. Ignore any other pretty-boy squires. They're just bendy playthings. Use the power of attraction: he's the one that means nothing. You're the one that's going to win.
10. Plant mages have many, many useful skills. So do people who can communicate telepathically. Take advantage.