Kit
Squire
Duchess of Emelan
Posts: 1,151
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Post by Kit on Jul 1, 2011 10:41:31 GMT 10
Title: Survival Rating: PG Couple/Character: Tris/Vedris Event: 110 word hurdles Words: 110 Summary: A man reads a report
Landslides in Kerang. A tumult of rock as the earth shrugs into new shapes. And she would be at its heart: screaming, standing, grieving.
Reading reports, chasing inked whispers of red-haired witches, he recalls her at her most serious, standing in his library with Niko. The mage had questions.
(“You are sure?”
“What a thing to ask me.”)
Niklaren gone, he catches her in astronomy, book pressed to her indomitable nose.
(“I wish you well, my dear.”
“I..well. What a thing to—thank you.”)
She probably saved them, he thinks. And she will not know her own grace, looking instead at the shattered fragments of ordinariness about her feet.
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Post by wordy on Jul 1, 2011 10:51:32 GMT 10
I love this. You show both of their personalities so wonderfully!
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Post by journeycat on Jul 1, 2011 10:52:06 GMT 10
Oh, oh, I forgot how absolutely gorgeous your use of words are - each line feels like a story in itself. I love the very first little paragraph, and the very last; it's so fascinating to see how he views her.
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Post by ubiquitous on Jul 1, 2011 12:14:25 GMT 10
This is just gorgeous. ♥
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luinae
Rider Trainee
crazy girl
Posts: 89
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Post by luinae on Jul 1, 2011 12:39:54 GMT 10
kit, your writing is sublime. Each word is perfectly crafted and chosen and gah, I just adore this, OK?
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Moony
Squire
Posts: 1,058
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Post by Moony on Jul 2, 2011 4:35:48 GMT 10
Your writing is just so perfectly descriptive, it catches each moment so well, that it seems a full story in and of itself. I love how well you have both of their personalities.
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sidonie
Soldier
lunatic, lover, and poet
Posts: 928
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Post by sidonie on Jul 2, 2011 5:31:44 GMT 10
Gah, I love your writing so much! The image of Tris at the center of the earthquake is heartbreakingly lovely, and the last line is completely and utterly perfect. You have a way with words.
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