Post by devilinthedetails on Mar 2, 2018 12:38:38 GMT 10
Title: Forever Faithful
Rating: PG-13
Prompt: Faith
Summary: Lianne and Roald mourn the loss of an unborn child.
Forever Faithful
“I wish you would attend tonight’s feast with me.” Roald’s statement was close enough to an order that Lianne should have acceded graciously. She was a Naxen, after all, born and bred to be forever faithful to Conte commands, but the thought of the accusing eyes of the courtiers that would cut into her more sharply than carving knives made her want to hide her face from the world until the Black God took pity on her, stealing her life as he had robbed her of her never born child.
“I can’t.” A good wife, Lianne knew, would never have told her husband that she couldn’t do anything he requested of her, but Lianne had already proven that she wasn’t a good wife. She couldn’t bear her husband a breathing child—all she could give birth to was blood and death. By comparison, her refusal to accompany him to a feast was a minor matter.
“You must go on living, Lianne.” Roald’s tone was quiet and grave as the ghost of their unborn baby, and Lianne heard more loudly the unuttered half of his sentence: Even though their child was dead.
“It’s not only the sorrow that keeps me from going. It’s the shame.” Lianne bit her lip, tasted blood, and realized that she had become a creature of bitterness and woe.
“There’s no shame in a miscarriage, my love.” Roald spoke gently but all Lianne could hear was blame. His father, she thought as the cruel court whispers sliced through her mind, should never have decided to honor hers by arranging their marriage as a reward to the general who had won King Jasson more battles than any other. She was the seventh child in her family, and that might have foretold fertility if five miscarriages and stillbirths hadn’t separated her from her only surviving brother.
“There is in three in as many years.” Lianne’s voice didn’t shake though every other part of her trembled like grass bowing before a breeze. As the court comments that tore at Lianne’s heart and soul said, she was her mother’s daughter. After her first miscarriage in the first year of her marriage to Roald, the nobles had been sympathetic; following her second the following year, they had been impatient for her to conceive again; after her third they stared at her with naked scorn while making scarcely veiled suggestions that her husband should leave her for the stability of the country. “They say you should set me aside.”
“I’d sooner set them aside.” For an instant in his rare flare of vehemence, Roald sounded like his fearsome father. Fires that reminded her of the cities their fathers had burned blazed in his eyes. “Perhaps I shall let your brother use them as sheaths for his sword.”
“That would only mean more death.” Lianne grasped his wrist, hoping that he would feel in his bones that she was sick to her marrow of death.
“Your honor is the only cause worth killing for, my dear.” Roald’s words were chivalrous but Lianne shivered rather than finding comfort in them. What should have thrilled her with romance had struck her as tragic. He loved her but that love was only bringing forth bloodshed.
“Honor me with mercy, not killing.” Lianne squeezed his wrist, his veins pulsing against hers in a promise of passion. “Life is more valuable than death.”
“I’ll be faithful to your wishes as always.” Roald lifted her fingers to his mouth and kissed each one with a tenderness that was somehow strong enough something inside Lianne. “When you are ready, we will try for another child, and I know we will be blessed with a baby one day.”
Lianne chose to believe him even though none could predict the future since faith was all she and Roald had to cling to in a world that was not made to be understood, a world that turned any attempt at understanding it into a vanity, a fatal arrogance.
Rating: PG-13
Prompt: Faith
Summary: Lianne and Roald mourn the loss of an unborn child.
Forever Faithful
“I wish you would attend tonight’s feast with me.” Roald’s statement was close enough to an order that Lianne should have acceded graciously. She was a Naxen, after all, born and bred to be forever faithful to Conte commands, but the thought of the accusing eyes of the courtiers that would cut into her more sharply than carving knives made her want to hide her face from the world until the Black God took pity on her, stealing her life as he had robbed her of her never born child.
“I can’t.” A good wife, Lianne knew, would never have told her husband that she couldn’t do anything he requested of her, but Lianne had already proven that she wasn’t a good wife. She couldn’t bear her husband a breathing child—all she could give birth to was blood and death. By comparison, her refusal to accompany him to a feast was a minor matter.
“You must go on living, Lianne.” Roald’s tone was quiet and grave as the ghost of their unborn baby, and Lianne heard more loudly the unuttered half of his sentence: Even though their child was dead.
“It’s not only the sorrow that keeps me from going. It’s the shame.” Lianne bit her lip, tasted blood, and realized that she had become a creature of bitterness and woe.
“There’s no shame in a miscarriage, my love.” Roald spoke gently but all Lianne could hear was blame. His father, she thought as the cruel court whispers sliced through her mind, should never have decided to honor hers by arranging their marriage as a reward to the general who had won King Jasson more battles than any other. She was the seventh child in her family, and that might have foretold fertility if five miscarriages and stillbirths hadn’t separated her from her only surviving brother.
“There is in three in as many years.” Lianne’s voice didn’t shake though every other part of her trembled like grass bowing before a breeze. As the court comments that tore at Lianne’s heart and soul said, she was her mother’s daughter. After her first miscarriage in the first year of her marriage to Roald, the nobles had been sympathetic; following her second the following year, they had been impatient for her to conceive again; after her third they stared at her with naked scorn while making scarcely veiled suggestions that her husband should leave her for the stability of the country. “They say you should set me aside.”
“I’d sooner set them aside.” For an instant in his rare flare of vehemence, Roald sounded like his fearsome father. Fires that reminded her of the cities their fathers had burned blazed in his eyes. “Perhaps I shall let your brother use them as sheaths for his sword.”
“That would only mean more death.” Lianne grasped his wrist, hoping that he would feel in his bones that she was sick to her marrow of death.
“Your honor is the only cause worth killing for, my dear.” Roald’s words were chivalrous but Lianne shivered rather than finding comfort in them. What should have thrilled her with romance had struck her as tragic. He loved her but that love was only bringing forth bloodshed.
“Honor me with mercy, not killing.” Lianne squeezed his wrist, his veins pulsing against hers in a promise of passion. “Life is more valuable than death.”
“I’ll be faithful to your wishes as always.” Roald lifted her fingers to his mouth and kissed each one with a tenderness that was somehow strong enough something inside Lianne. “When you are ready, we will try for another child, and I know we will be blessed with a baby one day.”
Lianne chose to believe him even though none could predict the future since faith was all she and Roald had to cling to in a world that was not made to be understood, a world that turned any attempt at understanding it into a vanity, a fatal arrogance.