Post by Shhasow on Nov 21, 2010 3:57:48 GMT 10
A Revelation
Summary: Two separate confrontations lead to a revelation.
Rating: PG
This was originally going to be two chapters, but the characters had more to say.
Thank you Ankhiale!
Part 11 of 12
_________
Kel dragged her wet and weary body towards her rooms. They had finally arrived at Corus after a few days of very damp weather and little sleep, a result of the rain and her growing preoccupation with Wyldon. She was quite ready to sleep for a day before facing her friends, and that included her newest one.
Jump preceded her to the door, sniffing it thoroughly. He craned his blocky head at Kel and wagged his tail slightly.
Kel sighed. “What friend has invaded my room, Jump?” The list of people who had a copy of her key was short. She turned the door handle and found it locked.
“Neal,” she sighed again. Alanna the Lioness’ disreputable husband had taught her year-mate a few skills, including lock picking. Kel inserted her own key and pushed in, greeting her oldest friend with a tired smile.
“Hello, Neal, what brings you here? I just got in, and if you don’t mind, I’d like to change.” She gestured to her wet clothes.
“Nice horse.” His voice was flat.
Kel didn’t hear it; she gave a genuine grin. “So you saw me ride in? That’s Merry, and he’s a dream. Well, a bit bad-tempered,” she amended as she sat at her desk to pull off her boots, “but he’s superbly trained. I got him from the Cavall stables; Wyldon insisted.”
She froze for a second; Wyldon’s name had slipped out. She looked closely at her friend for the first time since entering the room, and it struck her as alarming that Neal was not smiling, instead wearing an expression of grimness that she had never before seen. He ignored Jump’s attempts to entice him into a nice scratch.
“So that’s where you were, Cavall. And it’s Wyldon now, is it?”
“Neal…”
“No. Don’t Neal me. Do you know how many people call him by his first name?”
Kel shrugged, hiding her flush. She hadn’t meant to tell Neal, not when she was too tired to explain it properly. Neal had a blind spot the size of Corus when it came to their training master. “His friends?”
“Kel, my own father doesn’t call the Stump by his first name, and he’s worked with the man for two decades.”
“If you’re trying to get at something, just say it, Neal. I’m too tired for your games.” She eyed her friend uneasily. He looked as if he were about to burst.
He took a deep breath in an attempt to calm himself. “Your absence has been noted by people,” he began slowly, “as has his, and the inordinate amount of time you have been spending together.” Neal examined Kel’s closed expression and switched tactics. “What did you pay for your Cavall horse?”
He knew he was onto something when she shifted uncomfortably and glanced away, so he pressed his advantage. “You both disappeared at the same time, and after your dance… people have been talking.”
“When do they not talk about me?” Kel commented neutrally. “I’ve been in bed with half of the knights in Tortall, yourself included.”
“Well, this time it’s different,” he snapped. “This time there is substance to the gossip and people are actually listening because it’s not implausible. A young woman, her old training master, training together, riding off in secret.”
“So you believe the rumors?” Kel felt cold chills running through her body.
He ran his fingers through his hair as he paced. “I don’t know what to believe, Kel. I don’t want to think that my best friend is our old training master’s mistress, but you’re not making it particularly easy for me.”
Kel sat in a peculiar frozen state, distracted by an odd ringing in her ears. Neal’s voice came as from a long tunnel and his words pierced her. She rubbed her scar.
“Don’t give me that Lump expression, Kel! I’m your friend, not him; don’t I have the right to talk to my friend and not that godsdamned mask?”
The world moved again and Kel’s Yamani mask fell away in an instant, revealing a wondering and hurt girl. “Neal…”
“Kel, he’s not a stray! He’s not Jump, Crown, or Peachblossom, or even Lalasa, you can’t save him with a few cheerful words and hard work! He’s a man, an implacable, inflexible, resentful, obstinate Stump of a man!”
“That sounds more like you than him,” she answered coolly. “Wyldon has changed, but you can’t see it, you never could.”
“A Stump never changes,” he spat savagely.
“Stop calling him that!” she leapt to her feet, breathing hard, eyes flashing. “You want me to drop my mask, to speak my mind? Fine!
“Wyldon and I are just friends, he’s said it too many times for it to be otherwise, no matter how much I want more,” she said bitterly. “I know it can never happen, I’m resigned, but I will not have you or anyone else blacken Wyldon’s reputation. He is the most honorable person I know, and he would never disrespect his wife or me like you so crudely suggest.”
“Alanna was right. I didn’t want to believe it, but she was right. He’s tricked you, forced you, something,” he gasped in a strangled voice.
“What does she have to do with anything? She hates Wyldon as much as you, hardly an unbiased source!”
He shook his head mutely and backed up as she advanced towards him, menace in every step.
“You listen here, Neal. Stay out of this. I am capable of deciding my own mind, of choosing my own friends. I don’t need you to tell me what to think or what to feel, and I certainly don’t need the Lioness doing it, either. You are just as hidebound as he is, but worse, because at least he can admit that he was wrong in the past, while you are stuck as a 15-year-old page, squawking about the unfairness of the man who spent years of his life training you so you might have a chance to survive as a knight.
“Now, I’m going to go to change because I am soaked. I am going to sleep because I am tired. Do you have any problems with that, friend?”
Neal, backed up against the wall, shook his head frantically.
Kel moved away and pointed to the door. He took the subtle hint and fled, slamming the door behind him.
She sat back down on her chair and groaned. When did life become so complicated?
Neal was wondering the same thing as he ran through the palace towards Alanna’s rooms. He hadn’t seen Kel like that since, well, never.
Alanna was right. There was no way Kel could care for the Stump like that, she wouldn’t betray him, wouldn’t have yelled at him like that. Kel never lost control over herself, ever, and it was all the Stump’s fault.
The Lioness would fix it. After four years of experiencing her sharp sword and sharper tongue, Neal was convinced that there was nothing she couldn’t control, unless it was her temper.
***
The King’s Champion shut the door on her ranting former squire. When he was in a tiff, Neal was not suitable to be in public. It took a bit of convincing, but Alanna finally persuaded him to stay in her rooms and rave to the walls. She even had the foresight to take his lock-picks and magic the door soundproof and locked before she stalked off through the hall.
Alanna didn’t want him to contribute to the spreading rumors, but if what he said was true, that would be the least of their worries.
It wasn’t that she doubted Neal, it was just that he was known to be a touch prone to exaggeration.
The Lioness didn’t know Keladry of Mindelan well, and most of what she knew came from Neal, but she knew for a fact that the girl was level-headed, not at all prone to flights of fancy. If she liked the Stump - Alanna cringed at the mere thought - it was because he did something, addled her brain. No one with a working mind could be attracted to that old man.
He was older than herself by six years.
He hated female warriors.
He was bald.
Alanna couldn’t figure out how anyone could like him. The Stump wasn’t charming or witty, he wasn’t ugly, but neither did he smile, preferring to frown forbiddingly.
Surely their shared antagonistic past had kept the two at a distance? His insistence on probation for one, and Alanna had received reports over the years that the training master was particularly hard on Keladry.
Then again, it was almost easier to think of the girl as nursing a silly crush than to believe that they were friends, as Neal ranted that Kel claimed.
Friends implied equals, and it was unfathomable to Alanna that the Stump would ever consider anyone an equal to himself. There were few people she knew that were more prideful, more condescending, more prejudiced, more narrow-minded…
Alanna gripped her fire ember in a fruitless attempt to rein back her temper before she exploded a la Neal.
If he had compromised her in any way, if he had taken advantage of a young lonely girl with a big heart…
The blatant hypocrisy set Alanna’s teeth grinding. He claimed his honor strictly bound him, that he could never compromise his principles, but what else would you call seducing a young star-struck inexperienced girl?
Well, she might not be able to match him on the tilting yard, but Alanna knew she could trounce him with swords.
Just the thought of humiliating the stiff hypocrite sent a thrill racing through her veins. She could see herself, sword to his throat, his worthless pleadings filling her ears, Keladry’s relieved face…
Alanna’s blood boiled; her vision went red.
She reached his door and with a violet-wreathed hand, shattered it to pieces.
***
Wyldon had been enjoying a pleasant dream. He couldn’t remember about what exactly, only that it involved a soft husky voice and cool calloused hands nestled securely in his own, and a feeling of peace that soothed his tired soul.
When his door blew in with a thunderous crash, he jumped to his feet without a thought, dagger from under his pillow in his ready hand.
In the split second his tired brain had to think, he expected raiders, Scanrans, anything but the short red-haired woman with flashing violet eyes and a half unsheathed sword.
“What do you want?” he snarled.
Alanna was taken aback, fury momentarily derailed at the sight of the Stump crouched defensively with a long dagger in one hand and dressed only in a loincloth. “For Goddess’ sake, put on breeches,” she grimaced, half turning away.
“You are the one who destroyed my door,” he growled. “Tell me what you want and get out, or by Mithros, I will-“
“You’ll what?” she demanded, deciding to ignore his state of undress. “You’ll throw me out?”
Wyldon set down the dagger on his desk with a dull thud, taking the brief second to master his temper. “Unless you immediately state your purpose and pay to fix my door,” he said in a tight voice.
Alanna was never one to take a convoluted path when a straight one existed. “What is your business with Keladry of Mindelan?”
Wyldon bit back a groan. He hadn’t expected to be interrogated so quickly after his arrival, and did the godsdamned chit have to destroy his door? “It is none of your concern,” he said coldly, drawing himself to his full height and staring down at the short woman.
Alanna looked up at too many men in her life to be intimidated by one more. “It is if she is being taken advantage of, if she’s being led on-“
“So I’m either a lecher or a faithless cad,” he said tersely. “We cannot have an innocent friendship.”
“No, you can’t! A friendship would be difficult enough to believe, but you’ve convinced her to hope for more and she’s suffering for it!”
A rush of emotions overwhelmed him, joy, fear, dread, anticipation, sadness, relief, and hope. The rush of blood to his head made his vision grey momentarily and he missed the next few words of the infuriating woman.
Keladry wanted more than friendship?
Their journey back, though wet and miserable, was made bearable, more than bearable by her presence. He had taken Elsabenne’s advice to heart and tried to analyze what he felt for Keladry, friendship or more.
When Wyldon realized that he missed Keladry when she was gone, that nothing gave him more pleasure than to simply be in her company – whether training, talking, or dancing – he had felt a gigantic weight lifted off his chest.
He admired her too much for just friendship, found his eyes lingering in her direction too long, had too many distracting thoughts when she was near and too many depressing ones when she was gone.
As soon as his realization hit him and the burden of confusion lifted, a weight pressed down on his heart and sunk it to the pit of his stomach.
It didn’t matter than he had found someone to admire, someone to ache after. It was worse that he did, for a young, smart, determined, beautiful woman like Keladry would never see an old man like him as anything other than a friend, and he had been lucky to get even that.
On the ride back to Corus, Wyldon had relegated himself to the mere crumbs of friendship.
But now…
Wyldon wasn’t sure whether to kill the Lioness or kiss her.
Alanna was getting more angry by the second. Wyldon didn’t seem to be listening to her; he stared in her direction coldly enough, but his hand drifted to his upper back as if not under his control.
Her temper snapped.
“Are you sleeping with the Lady Knight or not?”
He snapped back his attention to her and Alanna felt her insides quiver at the look of loathing and fury painted on his face.
“As aware as I am of the vile gossip in this place,” he said tightly, “I would have expected such vitriol to come from Stone Mountain, or Groten, anyone but the only other female knight.”
“It’s because I am that I have the right,” she retorted, eyes flashing. “Only I know what it’s like to be alone in a world of men, how easy it is to fancy yourself in love, how many people want you to fail.”
“You think I want to sabotage her?”
“You’re doing a fine job of ruining her reputation! I don’t blame her, she’s confused, she doesn’t know what to think-“
“How dare you speak for Keladry?” he said with clipped words. “You can’t. You did not see her grow from a determined young girl into a more resolute woman.”
“Because of you, I couldn’t!”
He nodded sharply. “And it was the right decision. Keladry didn’t need your help; she didn’t need the additional whispers that you had bespelled her.”
“I would never have done that!”
“Of course not, not even I would believe it, but others would have,” he snapped, then continued firmly. “You think others wished for your failure? After you were revealed, they did. After Sir Alanna became known, many people hoped you would fail, but when you were a boy, you were safe in your anonymity. No one cared to gossip about Page Alan.
“Unlike you, Keladry did not hide herself. She took vicious slander and gossip at ten and handled it better than you do now at forty, and I will not,” his voice cracked like a whip and Alanna jumped, “stand for you adding to the malicious rumor-mongering that goes on in this place. If Keladry knew, she would be heartbroken. She worshipped you growing up.”
As Alanna stared at his resolute face, a revelation hit her that made her head spin.
“Goddess, you love the girl,” she gasped.
His face smoothed out blankly, the only hint of his emotions buried deep in his cold flinty gaze.
“If you do not leave, I shall throw you out,” he said in a clipped voice.
Alanna believed him this time. She left the room with as much dignity as possible, gingerly stepping over the broken splinters of wood on the ground, and ignored the prying eyes of the servants drawn by the commotion, her commotion. The Lioness headed towards her rooms and the trapped Neal as quickly as possible without running, breaking out in a cold sweat and feeling the bitter tinge of guilt now that her anger was shocked away. Perhaps she ought not to have meddled.
The Stump was right about one thing. Keladry was old enough to make her own decisions for good or ill, and Alanna should not add to her troubles.
She would do what she could and keep Neal quiet, but Alanna thought it was already too late, the damage done after her hasty and loud accusations.
Summary: Two separate confrontations lead to a revelation.
Rating: PG
This was originally going to be two chapters, but the characters had more to say.
Thank you Ankhiale!
Part 11 of 12
_________
Kel dragged her wet and weary body towards her rooms. They had finally arrived at Corus after a few days of very damp weather and little sleep, a result of the rain and her growing preoccupation with Wyldon. She was quite ready to sleep for a day before facing her friends, and that included her newest one.
Jump preceded her to the door, sniffing it thoroughly. He craned his blocky head at Kel and wagged his tail slightly.
Kel sighed. “What friend has invaded my room, Jump?” The list of people who had a copy of her key was short. She turned the door handle and found it locked.
“Neal,” she sighed again. Alanna the Lioness’ disreputable husband had taught her year-mate a few skills, including lock picking. Kel inserted her own key and pushed in, greeting her oldest friend with a tired smile.
“Hello, Neal, what brings you here? I just got in, and if you don’t mind, I’d like to change.” She gestured to her wet clothes.
“Nice horse.” His voice was flat.
Kel didn’t hear it; she gave a genuine grin. “So you saw me ride in? That’s Merry, and he’s a dream. Well, a bit bad-tempered,” she amended as she sat at her desk to pull off her boots, “but he’s superbly trained. I got him from the Cavall stables; Wyldon insisted.”
She froze for a second; Wyldon’s name had slipped out. She looked closely at her friend for the first time since entering the room, and it struck her as alarming that Neal was not smiling, instead wearing an expression of grimness that she had never before seen. He ignored Jump’s attempts to entice him into a nice scratch.
“So that’s where you were, Cavall. And it’s Wyldon now, is it?”
“Neal…”
“No. Don’t Neal me. Do you know how many people call him by his first name?”
Kel shrugged, hiding her flush. She hadn’t meant to tell Neal, not when she was too tired to explain it properly. Neal had a blind spot the size of Corus when it came to their training master. “His friends?”
“Kel, my own father doesn’t call the Stump by his first name, and he’s worked with the man for two decades.”
“If you’re trying to get at something, just say it, Neal. I’m too tired for your games.” She eyed her friend uneasily. He looked as if he were about to burst.
He took a deep breath in an attempt to calm himself. “Your absence has been noted by people,” he began slowly, “as has his, and the inordinate amount of time you have been spending together.” Neal examined Kel’s closed expression and switched tactics. “What did you pay for your Cavall horse?”
He knew he was onto something when she shifted uncomfortably and glanced away, so he pressed his advantage. “You both disappeared at the same time, and after your dance… people have been talking.”
“When do they not talk about me?” Kel commented neutrally. “I’ve been in bed with half of the knights in Tortall, yourself included.”
“Well, this time it’s different,” he snapped. “This time there is substance to the gossip and people are actually listening because it’s not implausible. A young woman, her old training master, training together, riding off in secret.”
“So you believe the rumors?” Kel felt cold chills running through her body.
He ran his fingers through his hair as he paced. “I don’t know what to believe, Kel. I don’t want to think that my best friend is our old training master’s mistress, but you’re not making it particularly easy for me.”
Kel sat in a peculiar frozen state, distracted by an odd ringing in her ears. Neal’s voice came as from a long tunnel and his words pierced her. She rubbed her scar.
“Don’t give me that Lump expression, Kel! I’m your friend, not him; don’t I have the right to talk to my friend and not that godsdamned mask?”
The world moved again and Kel’s Yamani mask fell away in an instant, revealing a wondering and hurt girl. “Neal…”
“Kel, he’s not a stray! He’s not Jump, Crown, or Peachblossom, or even Lalasa, you can’t save him with a few cheerful words and hard work! He’s a man, an implacable, inflexible, resentful, obstinate Stump of a man!”
“That sounds more like you than him,” she answered coolly. “Wyldon has changed, but you can’t see it, you never could.”
“A Stump never changes,” he spat savagely.
“Stop calling him that!” she leapt to her feet, breathing hard, eyes flashing. “You want me to drop my mask, to speak my mind? Fine!
“Wyldon and I are just friends, he’s said it too many times for it to be otherwise, no matter how much I want more,” she said bitterly. “I know it can never happen, I’m resigned, but I will not have you or anyone else blacken Wyldon’s reputation. He is the most honorable person I know, and he would never disrespect his wife or me like you so crudely suggest.”
“Alanna was right. I didn’t want to believe it, but she was right. He’s tricked you, forced you, something,” he gasped in a strangled voice.
“What does she have to do with anything? She hates Wyldon as much as you, hardly an unbiased source!”
He shook his head mutely and backed up as she advanced towards him, menace in every step.
“You listen here, Neal. Stay out of this. I am capable of deciding my own mind, of choosing my own friends. I don’t need you to tell me what to think or what to feel, and I certainly don’t need the Lioness doing it, either. You are just as hidebound as he is, but worse, because at least he can admit that he was wrong in the past, while you are stuck as a 15-year-old page, squawking about the unfairness of the man who spent years of his life training you so you might have a chance to survive as a knight.
“Now, I’m going to go to change because I am soaked. I am going to sleep because I am tired. Do you have any problems with that, friend?”
Neal, backed up against the wall, shook his head frantically.
Kel moved away and pointed to the door. He took the subtle hint and fled, slamming the door behind him.
She sat back down on her chair and groaned. When did life become so complicated?
Neal was wondering the same thing as he ran through the palace towards Alanna’s rooms. He hadn’t seen Kel like that since, well, never.
Alanna was right. There was no way Kel could care for the Stump like that, she wouldn’t betray him, wouldn’t have yelled at him like that. Kel never lost control over herself, ever, and it was all the Stump’s fault.
The Lioness would fix it. After four years of experiencing her sharp sword and sharper tongue, Neal was convinced that there was nothing she couldn’t control, unless it was her temper.
***
The King’s Champion shut the door on her ranting former squire. When he was in a tiff, Neal was not suitable to be in public. It took a bit of convincing, but Alanna finally persuaded him to stay in her rooms and rave to the walls. She even had the foresight to take his lock-picks and magic the door soundproof and locked before she stalked off through the hall.
Alanna didn’t want him to contribute to the spreading rumors, but if what he said was true, that would be the least of their worries.
It wasn’t that she doubted Neal, it was just that he was known to be a touch prone to exaggeration.
The Lioness didn’t know Keladry of Mindelan well, and most of what she knew came from Neal, but she knew for a fact that the girl was level-headed, not at all prone to flights of fancy. If she liked the Stump - Alanna cringed at the mere thought - it was because he did something, addled her brain. No one with a working mind could be attracted to that old man.
He was older than herself by six years.
He hated female warriors.
He was bald.
Alanna couldn’t figure out how anyone could like him. The Stump wasn’t charming or witty, he wasn’t ugly, but neither did he smile, preferring to frown forbiddingly.
Surely their shared antagonistic past had kept the two at a distance? His insistence on probation for one, and Alanna had received reports over the years that the training master was particularly hard on Keladry.
Then again, it was almost easier to think of the girl as nursing a silly crush than to believe that they were friends, as Neal ranted that Kel claimed.
Friends implied equals, and it was unfathomable to Alanna that the Stump would ever consider anyone an equal to himself. There were few people she knew that were more prideful, more condescending, more prejudiced, more narrow-minded…
Alanna gripped her fire ember in a fruitless attempt to rein back her temper before she exploded a la Neal.
If he had compromised her in any way, if he had taken advantage of a young lonely girl with a big heart…
The blatant hypocrisy set Alanna’s teeth grinding. He claimed his honor strictly bound him, that he could never compromise his principles, but what else would you call seducing a young star-struck inexperienced girl?
Well, she might not be able to match him on the tilting yard, but Alanna knew she could trounce him with swords.
Just the thought of humiliating the stiff hypocrite sent a thrill racing through her veins. She could see herself, sword to his throat, his worthless pleadings filling her ears, Keladry’s relieved face…
Alanna’s blood boiled; her vision went red.
She reached his door and with a violet-wreathed hand, shattered it to pieces.
***
Wyldon had been enjoying a pleasant dream. He couldn’t remember about what exactly, only that it involved a soft husky voice and cool calloused hands nestled securely in his own, and a feeling of peace that soothed his tired soul.
When his door blew in with a thunderous crash, he jumped to his feet without a thought, dagger from under his pillow in his ready hand.
In the split second his tired brain had to think, he expected raiders, Scanrans, anything but the short red-haired woman with flashing violet eyes and a half unsheathed sword.
“What do you want?” he snarled.
Alanna was taken aback, fury momentarily derailed at the sight of the Stump crouched defensively with a long dagger in one hand and dressed only in a loincloth. “For Goddess’ sake, put on breeches,” she grimaced, half turning away.
“You are the one who destroyed my door,” he growled. “Tell me what you want and get out, or by Mithros, I will-“
“You’ll what?” she demanded, deciding to ignore his state of undress. “You’ll throw me out?”
Wyldon set down the dagger on his desk with a dull thud, taking the brief second to master his temper. “Unless you immediately state your purpose and pay to fix my door,” he said in a tight voice.
Alanna was never one to take a convoluted path when a straight one existed. “What is your business with Keladry of Mindelan?”
Wyldon bit back a groan. He hadn’t expected to be interrogated so quickly after his arrival, and did the godsdamned chit have to destroy his door? “It is none of your concern,” he said coldly, drawing himself to his full height and staring down at the short woman.
Alanna looked up at too many men in her life to be intimidated by one more. “It is if she is being taken advantage of, if she’s being led on-“
“So I’m either a lecher or a faithless cad,” he said tersely. “We cannot have an innocent friendship.”
“No, you can’t! A friendship would be difficult enough to believe, but you’ve convinced her to hope for more and she’s suffering for it!”
A rush of emotions overwhelmed him, joy, fear, dread, anticipation, sadness, relief, and hope. The rush of blood to his head made his vision grey momentarily and he missed the next few words of the infuriating woman.
Keladry wanted more than friendship?
Their journey back, though wet and miserable, was made bearable, more than bearable by her presence. He had taken Elsabenne’s advice to heart and tried to analyze what he felt for Keladry, friendship or more.
When Wyldon realized that he missed Keladry when she was gone, that nothing gave him more pleasure than to simply be in her company – whether training, talking, or dancing – he had felt a gigantic weight lifted off his chest.
He admired her too much for just friendship, found his eyes lingering in her direction too long, had too many distracting thoughts when she was near and too many depressing ones when she was gone.
As soon as his realization hit him and the burden of confusion lifted, a weight pressed down on his heart and sunk it to the pit of his stomach.
It didn’t matter than he had found someone to admire, someone to ache after. It was worse that he did, for a young, smart, determined, beautiful woman like Keladry would never see an old man like him as anything other than a friend, and he had been lucky to get even that.
On the ride back to Corus, Wyldon had relegated himself to the mere crumbs of friendship.
But now…
Wyldon wasn’t sure whether to kill the Lioness or kiss her.
Alanna was getting more angry by the second. Wyldon didn’t seem to be listening to her; he stared in her direction coldly enough, but his hand drifted to his upper back as if not under his control.
Her temper snapped.
“Are you sleeping with the Lady Knight or not?”
He snapped back his attention to her and Alanna felt her insides quiver at the look of loathing and fury painted on his face.
“As aware as I am of the vile gossip in this place,” he said tightly, “I would have expected such vitriol to come from Stone Mountain, or Groten, anyone but the only other female knight.”
“It’s because I am that I have the right,” she retorted, eyes flashing. “Only I know what it’s like to be alone in a world of men, how easy it is to fancy yourself in love, how many people want you to fail.”
“You think I want to sabotage her?”
“You’re doing a fine job of ruining her reputation! I don’t blame her, she’s confused, she doesn’t know what to think-“
“How dare you speak for Keladry?” he said with clipped words. “You can’t. You did not see her grow from a determined young girl into a more resolute woman.”
“Because of you, I couldn’t!”
He nodded sharply. “And it was the right decision. Keladry didn’t need your help; she didn’t need the additional whispers that you had bespelled her.”
“I would never have done that!”
“Of course not, not even I would believe it, but others would have,” he snapped, then continued firmly. “You think others wished for your failure? After you were revealed, they did. After Sir Alanna became known, many people hoped you would fail, but when you were a boy, you were safe in your anonymity. No one cared to gossip about Page Alan.
“Unlike you, Keladry did not hide herself. She took vicious slander and gossip at ten and handled it better than you do now at forty, and I will not,” his voice cracked like a whip and Alanna jumped, “stand for you adding to the malicious rumor-mongering that goes on in this place. If Keladry knew, she would be heartbroken. She worshipped you growing up.”
As Alanna stared at his resolute face, a revelation hit her that made her head spin.
“Goddess, you love the girl,” she gasped.
His face smoothed out blankly, the only hint of his emotions buried deep in his cold flinty gaze.
“If you do not leave, I shall throw you out,” he said in a clipped voice.
Alanna believed him this time. She left the room with as much dignity as possible, gingerly stepping over the broken splinters of wood on the ground, and ignored the prying eyes of the servants drawn by the commotion, her commotion. The Lioness headed towards her rooms and the trapped Neal as quickly as possible without running, breaking out in a cold sweat and feeling the bitter tinge of guilt now that her anger was shocked away. Perhaps she ought not to have meddled.
The Stump was right about one thing. Keladry was old enough to make her own decisions for good or ill, and Alanna should not add to her troubles.
She would do what she could and keep Neal quiet, but Alanna thought it was already too late, the damage done after her hasty and loud accusations.