Post by Kit on Feb 17, 2010 18:41:56 GMT 10
Title: Hero of the Realm
Rating: PG-13
Length: 350
Competitor: Neal
Round: 1/C
Summary: Neal despairs of his peers on the Royal Progress.
“Send me out! Let me be gone, far away! Give me something that hacks.”
Alanna looked up, smiling at Neal’s wince as she ran a dagger over her whetstone. “I’ll hack you.”
“The other sort of hacking!”
“You, Squire, are in a mood.
Neal sighed. “I’m always in a mood. Moods, you know, really are essential to—”
“—Your mouth is moving,” said the Lioness. “See to that. But why, boy, do you want to deal with phlegm?”
It was not, Neal knew, time to remind Alanna that he was several years older than her children. Then again, it never was.
A pause.
“You didn’t hit me.”
“I rarely have to.”
“You know what I mean, Alanna.” Cautiously, Neal sat beside the small hero on the overly neat castle bed, wincing again as steel dragged across steel and, he felt, somewhere soft behind his eyelids. “My ears aren’t bleeding.”
She moved the blade again, and then she laughed. “Mostly, I’m just curious,” she said.
“I can’t stand the way they look at her!”
“Ah.”
“No. You haven’t seen it. She spends time away with the Own and then children who’ve grown up with her start ogling her as if—as if—”
“—As if she’s suddenly grown breasts?”
“—like some sort of—well, she has.”
“I’m afraid it happens.”
“Cleon can’t keep his hands off her and is dropping epithets like sweat, and Owen, well—”
“—I’m sure,” said Alanna, disarmingly soothing and clapping him on the shoulder as Neal continued to mutter dire things about ‘melons’, “It’s just awful.”
Neal shuddered.
“So,” said Alanna, grinning broadly. “You’re a noble, holy sort who does not want to see Squire Kel with her kit off?”
“That has—you are—nothing—that has nothing…”
“Breathe, and answer carefully, my Squire.”
“For a Hero of the Realm, you are crude. I hope Stormwings claw out your evil, purple eyes.”
Alanna’s grin did not fade as she stood. “I have shamefully neglected your education,” she informed him now. “From next week, Neal, I think you need to examine ulcerating skin conditions.”
Rating: PG-13
Length: 350
Competitor: Neal
Round: 1/C
Summary: Neal despairs of his peers on the Royal Progress.
“Send me out! Let me be gone, far away! Give me something that hacks.”
Alanna looked up, smiling at Neal’s wince as she ran a dagger over her whetstone. “I’ll hack you.”
“The other sort of hacking!”
“You, Squire, are in a mood.
Neal sighed. “I’m always in a mood. Moods, you know, really are essential to—”
“—Your mouth is moving,” said the Lioness. “See to that. But why, boy, do you want to deal with phlegm?”
It was not, Neal knew, time to remind Alanna that he was several years older than her children. Then again, it never was.
A pause.
“You didn’t hit me.”
“I rarely have to.”
“You know what I mean, Alanna.” Cautiously, Neal sat beside the small hero on the overly neat castle bed, wincing again as steel dragged across steel and, he felt, somewhere soft behind his eyelids. “My ears aren’t bleeding.”
She moved the blade again, and then she laughed. “Mostly, I’m just curious,” she said.
“I can’t stand the way they look at her!”
“Ah.”
“No. You haven’t seen it. She spends time away with the Own and then children who’ve grown up with her start ogling her as if—as if—”
“—As if she’s suddenly grown breasts?”
“—like some sort of—well, she has.”
“I’m afraid it happens.”
“Cleon can’t keep his hands off her and is dropping epithets like sweat, and Owen, well—”
“—I’m sure,” said Alanna, disarmingly soothing and clapping him on the shoulder as Neal continued to mutter dire things about ‘melons’, “It’s just awful.”
Neal shuddered.
“So,” said Alanna, grinning broadly. “You’re a noble, holy sort who does not want to see Squire Kel with her kit off?”
“That has—you are—nothing—that has nothing…”
“Breathe, and answer carefully, my Squire.”
“For a Hero of the Realm, you are crude. I hope Stormwings claw out your evil, purple eyes.”
Alanna’s grin did not fade as she stood. “I have shamefully neglected your education,” she informed him now. “From next week, Neal, I think you need to examine ulcerating skin conditions.”