Rowena
Training Master
back to school... >.<
Posts: 2,661
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Post by Rowena on Aug 22, 2010 9:07:09 GMT 10
Title: The Pride of our House Summary: See the waves they come in, but they won't go back out. Dunevon fic. Rating: PG Warning: (canon) character death A/N: I'm not sure why I did a poem, but I hope you enjoy it! this glorious boy-child, the pride of our house, see the waves they come in and the waves they go out
excitement is mounting, upon this fine day, and all of your friends, they’ve come out to play
a shiny new present, the grandest of all, a beautiful toy, astoundingly tall
lift up aboard now, and you’re the captain, it makes us so happy when we see you grin
with the sun in your hair, you stand in the bow, and all of the world is far down below
night frights will come, but this one won’t go, and you haven’t been able to cry “look, land ho!”
a cradle of coldness, a blanket of wet, this won’t obey orders – you’re getting upset
laments and swooning all over the docks, but all you remember is dashing on rocks
oh glorious boy-child, the pride of our house – see the waves they come in, but they won’t go back out
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Post by journeycat on Aug 22, 2010 10:08:25 GMT 10
Oooh, this is neat - I especially love the first and last stanzas, and how the waves go in and won't go out.
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Post by ev on Aug 22, 2010 10:18:45 GMT 10
Ah, so sad but so nicely written.
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Post by Lisa on Aug 22, 2010 10:30:17 GMT 10
This is rather spectacular, and I almost get the feeling it should be set to song, as if a ballad several hundred years later about the child-king.
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Post by Seek on Aug 22, 2010 17:32:33 GMT 10
Lovely circularity I am a bit too lazy to do scansion, but I think I'm agreeing with what Lisa mentioned up there - there's a very regular, pounding, driving rhythm to this poem that almost mimics the pattern of waves coming in and receding. There's a very musical quality to this.
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Rowena
Training Master
back to school... >.<
Posts: 2,661
|
Post by Rowena on Aug 23, 2010 8:33:33 GMT 10
Thanks everyone, I'm glad you all like it! *grins*
I hadn't thought of it as musical, but it would be interesting to have a ballad about Dunevon. Like, after the rebellion cooled off and people realized he was a victim, not a guilty party.
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