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Post by PeroxidePirate on May 23, 2010 12:31:11 GMT 10
Title: Stunning Rating: PG Prompt: #2 Walk the Line Category: 250 words Word count: 250 words Summary: She'll never know what it's like on the other side.
Berenene emerged from the dressing room in her new ballgown. It was a midnight blue creation, trimmed with glittering silver embroidery. The collar stood high in the back, before plunging to a deep V in the front. The bodice hugged the empress's figure to the waist; the skirt flared into a sweeping train. “How do I look?”
Rizu tilted her head, trying to give a professional appraisal. “Your majesty, if I may?”
The empress nodded, and her wardrobe mistress stepped forward, reaching out to adjust the fold of the collar. This brought her face-to-face with the most beautiful woman in all of Namorn. She was careful to keep her breathing steady and her face serene.
“My dear.” Berenene touched Rizu's wrist, meeting her eyes with a penetrating gaze. “How do I look?”
“Absolutely stunning.”
Berenene responded with a coy smile. “Would you sell your inheritance – supposing you had one – for a dance with me? Would you fall to your knees to prove your devotion?”
“At any time.” Rizu released the gown's collar to take Berenene's free hand in hers. “Only say the word.”
“Ah.” This smile was pure delight. “The gown does its job, then. What would I do without you, my girl?”
Rizu stopped, rethinking her last impulse, which was to kiss the empress's fingertips. She bowed her head in a minute curtsy. “I am but your humble servant, your majesty.”
“I count on that, Rizu.”
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Post by greenie on May 23, 2010 13:01:14 GMT 10
Ooh, wow. This is fascinating! Cleverly written.
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Post by PeroxidePirate on May 23, 2010 13:14:15 GMT 10
Thank you!
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Rowena
Training Master
back to school... >.<
Posts: 2,661
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Post by Rowena on May 23, 2010 23:47:04 GMT 10
Ooo I love this! I love how you've written them both, so calculating and never saying anything completely honest. Good job!
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Post by PeroxidePirate on May 30, 2010 13:00:20 GMT 10
Thank you. Berenene is high on the list of characters I adore, so long as they're not real.
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Post by Katty on Jun 7, 2010 11:04:14 GMT 10
Oh my, I love love LOVE this. You are spot on with Berenene and Rizu!
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Post by PeroxidePirate on Jun 7, 2010 13:44:04 GMT 10
Aw, thank you! I may have to visit Berenene again when Royal Week comes around.
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Post by Katty on Jun 7, 2010 14:13:13 GMT 10
Please do!!!!!
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Post by Verasque on Aug 18, 2010 19:05:17 GMT 10
I applaud you on how natural this just is. So effortless that it makes it so sweet to read!
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