|
Post by Lisa on May 29, 2009 7:59:27 GMT 10
Title: Running Through Rating: PG-13 (?) Prompt: Numbers, Villains, Switch Category: 100 word Word count: 100 Summary: On the second try, things go as planned…
On the second pass, Voeldon decides to something drastic. It is time to rid the world of her kind of scum. He nods to his two friends, then begins his run. She’s green; it isn’t hard. Her breastplate is loose enough to slide around, and the lance easily drives into her torso. He whirls his stallion around, expecting to hear ovations from other conservatives, but there is silence. Horror is etched on most faces. Some cry out in shock. And behind him, Ansil and Joren cheer enthusiastically, the two of them understanding what Mindelan’s death will mean for the realm.
|
|
anilaurel
Queen's Rider
Posts: 505
Gender: Other
|
Post by anilaurel on May 29, 2009 10:26:30 GMT 10
*all hail* *bows* you put all three in one. This is sooo awesome.
Great job on the emotion of the audience.
|
|
|
Post by ubiquitous on May 29, 2009 12:52:31 GMT 10
Guh. I just love this. Wonderfully done!
|
|
|
Post by Rosie on May 29, 2009 17:33:08 GMT 10
;D This is completely awesome - you worked everything in very naturally. The last line is particularly effective, in making me wonder what it really means for the realm.
|
|
|
Post by Lisa on May 31, 2009 0:15:10 GMT 10
;D Thank you, everyone! I'm glad it was effective!
|
|
|
Post by Cass on May 31, 2009 5:34:51 GMT 10
Oh my god. Wow. This is amazingly effective, especially in the implications.
|
|
|
Post by Katty on Jun 29, 2009 12:01:27 GMT 10
Gosh... this drabble creeped me out a bit. Lovely work, as always.
|
|
|
Post by Lisa on Jul 3, 2009 11:42:14 GMT 10
cassandra & Katty - thank you for reading! ^_^ And I'm really flattered to have creeped you out, Kat.
|
|
|
Post by Katty on Jul 13, 2009 19:50:24 GMT 10
Yeah, I know. I didn't think something so... uncreepy could creep me out. Its a little strange!
|
|
|
Post by zbilja on Jul 19, 2009 21:47:05 GMT 10
Wonderfully done! I think it might be a little more effective with just a teensy bit more suspense, but if you like it how it is, then I do too!
Beautiful work (as always!) Please keep it up!
|
|
|
Post by Lisa on Jul 20, 2009 0:15:02 GMT 10
Thank you, Iva - I think you're quite right, but I'm not quite good with the 100-word format, so I had no clue to where to begin in changing things. ^_^;;
|
|