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Post by boosette on Mar 31, 2009 9:41:40 GMT 10
Title: Parched Earth Rating: PG/K Prompt: #1, Color Summary: Kel and Owen, doom and gloom. * Road dust. It stains everything to a nondescript shade of tan, from the bits of dried grass to the clay powder that turns the air golden to the desert sand sparkling its way ever northward. Owen is covered in it – he looks tired. His mount is in good condition, though; Kel wonders how close to beggaring itself Cavall is, keeping its stock this well maintained. It's not her first time here, but it is the first since the drought. "Kel!" Owen shouts, riding out to meet her. "Is Roald going to use the Jewel?" She shakes her head. "Not yet." *
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Post by Katty on Mar 31, 2009 12:38:04 GMT 10
Oh wow! This is so descriptive and has so much plot potential
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Post by ubiquitous on Mar 31, 2009 13:07:21 GMT 10
This is really well done! I love the descriptiveness.
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Post by boosette on Apr 1, 2009 0:38:27 GMT 10
Thank you, guys - I have a time and a half with drabbles & description, so I'm glad you think I wrote this one well.
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Post by wordy on Apr 1, 2009 18:19:18 GMT 10
Ooo, that's a great idea! And it's left me wanting more!
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Post by boosette on Apr 1, 2009 23:32:31 GMT 10
Thank you, wordy. I see it left a lot of y'all wanting more - I hope it also stands alone
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Post by Lisa on Apr 4, 2009 16:21:42 GMT 10
I love the notion that Cavall takes care of the critters more than the humans. Very IC, in my opinion. And your words caught the aridness wonderfully. I love it as a stand-alone. ^__^
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Post by girlcalledsun on Apr 5, 2009 1:37:48 GMT 10
Grown up Owen and Kel, I like very much. As said before, the descriptions are great.
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Post by k4writer02 on Apr 6, 2009 4:26:18 GMT 10
I like this a lot. The push/pull of expectations and consequences on a king and the effects of drought--wow. Poor Owen.
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Post by boosette on Apr 6, 2009 5:19:43 GMT 10
@lisa - No way Wyldon would stand for his critters going hungry. (In my head, Owen & family came back to help out because Jesslaw isn't as hard-hit. Or Owen's a younger son who, with Margarry, is at Cavall full time.)
@sun - Thanks! Owen and Kel are ♥
@k4 - Thanks! That was one of the things I'd hoped to get across, and I'm glad it comes off that way.
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Post by Strapless on Apr 7, 2009 13:14:41 GMT 10
Whoa--powerful.
I really like how this drabble shows that the story continues beyond the back cover of the book, and that the story isn't necessarily a happy one.
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Post by boosette on Apr 7, 2009 22:48:50 GMT 10
Thank you
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Post by Lisa on Apr 8, 2009 13:30:18 GMT 10
(In my pseudo-canon Owen is too attached to Wyldon to ever leave Cavall in the first place.)
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Post by boosette on Apr 8, 2009 21:46:20 GMT 10
(In my pseudo-canon Owen is too attached to Wyldon to ever leave Cavall in the first place.) Owen (ten years later): You'll never get rid of me, milord. Wyldom: ;D Of course not. You're finally properly trained.
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Post by Lisa on Apr 8, 2009 22:10:44 GMT 10
Ah, the seven stages of Wyldon-grief. #2 is my favorite. ^__^
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Post by boosette on Apr 8, 2009 22:40:09 GMT 10
1. WTF 2. DO NOT WANT 3. Crap. 4. Huh. 5. Fine. BUT I WON'T LIKE IT. Much. 6. Okay, maybe a little. 7. You win, joining in ;D now.
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Post by Lisa on Apr 11, 2009 7:27:43 GMT 10
I'm *so* using these emoticons to inspire Wyldon-and-Owen drabbles about Wydon beginning to adore his squire-turned-son-in-law.
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Post by boosette on Apr 11, 2009 23:17:37 GMT 10
I for one cannot wait to see them!
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Post by Anaroriel on Apr 12, 2009 5:48:58 GMT 10
Ooh, I like all the descriptions of the brown and road dust. Very cool.
I also want to know now why Roald would need to use the Jewel!
Great drabble. ^^
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Imogen
Probationer Page
Posts: 100
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Post by Imogen on May 6, 2009 10:39:12 GMT 10
Oh, wow. Apocafic! I like how the spare and lovely writing mixes with the DOOM of the premise. That's just how it should be: desperate but not melodramatic and overwrought. I would read this story.
The fact that you pack a whole verse into so few words is pretty darn cool.
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